The gov’mint says Internet radio has to go
Ooh this evil Interweb, don’t you hate it so? What with the Internet predators, online scams and all the rest, at least the government bureaucracy is trying to do something about it. Earlier this week the Copyright Royalty Board, better known as NAMBLA, has decided that fees for online royalties need to double in size over the next couple years lest our pauper music industry collapse for want of sustenance.
Thank the heavens the CRB, or NAMBLA if you will, is there looking out for the best interests of all American citizens and not just bowing to the whims of highly financed lawyers from a powerful industry lobby. I’m talking of course about those Internet broadcasters. What a powerful bunch, lobbying Congress and getting their way all the time. It’s about time they get raped in the ass like everyone else trying to deal with the entertainment industry. Well, okay, they already were getting raped in the ass, but not enough.
I mean, seriously, how does anyone expect the music industry to stay afloat if they can’t extract $600,000 to $1 million from a non-commercial broadcaster like SomaFM? Non-commercial? That doesn’t excuse them from having to pony up at the alter of the RIAA, also known as NAMBLA, and SoundExchange. Music isn’t free, you can’t just think you can give it away. We don’t care if this is a burgeoning industry with the potential to have more listeners than terrestrial radio. (Or maybe because Lowry Mays of Clear Channel slipped that check underneath our bra strap, we do care about that.)
You known that these Webcaters are up to no good if they have a bunch of commie-pinko, left wing publications bemoaning the fact that the government is trying to shut them down. I don’t know what this BusinessWeek is, but they are clearly part of the lunatic fringe for taking the side of Internet radio. And clearly whoever this Steven Forbes is, he must want to see the downfall of Western capitalism if he’s publishing a magazine rushing to the defense of these rowdy, thieving Webcasters.
Yes, the Internet is full of pirates, theives, and predators, so it’s best that we just shut it all down now before it all gets out of hand. We better put online radio out of business before it actually becomes a business, because there is nothing worse for American industry than competition.
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